If We Don't Change We Don't Grow

Updated: Feb 15

Not Liking Change Makes Us Stressed. What's stress? Resisting What Is. Moving With Change Allows For You To Flow With Life.


"The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance."

.-Alan Watts


We can all agree that life is constantly changing and evolving, right? But we don't always see it coming. No matter how much we prepare for what may come, we still get stricken with surprise or shock, depending on if this change is viewed by us as 'good' or 'bad'.


The thing is, though. We are doing a lot of betting on good changes, good outcomes, preparing best we can, worrying about what will come, we are using our precious energy towards all that we have no control over. Leaving little, if any energy, for our own change and evolution.


What if I told you that the best, and only way to coexist with change and to influence the outcome is to focus on changing yourself? Now, this by no means implies that you need to become someone other than whom you desire to be. Or to become passive. What I'm saying is, learning how to relate to change internally will help you relate to the external change. And influence what will happen to you externally.


We are a part of this world, which means, we are meant to change WITH the world not stay stagnant. What if you had decided not to accept this concept of the internet, of social media, you wouldn't be reading this right now! Too much comfort hurts us. There is no growth in what you're comfortable doing. Things become harder to do, to understand and coexist with when you don't grow together with them.


For example, our body is constantly changing. We have a duty, to ourselves, to change WITH it. To listen and feel into the new understandings that our new form provides us with. Our body has an intelligence of its own. But if we resist changes, internal ones(mental states, thoughts, emotions) as well as physical (aging, external forces) then we are missing out on a HUGE part of this amazing experience.


What primarily makes change so darn difficult to accept and moreover, appreciate, is that we resist it because we think "change=not good". The association we have with it, the belief we hold regarding it, is what convinces us that it's going to "hurt us" in some way. We can subconsciously hold a belief saying "change doesn't feel good" or 'change doesn't usually end well for me" and we then reinforce that belief every time we think or say "I don't like change"


These thoughts, as little as they are, are powerful. Especially when they circulate your mind constantly.


So, what's the best way to get started on this journey of developing a healthy relationship with change? Make deliberate ones. Start off small. But YOU decide. Learn and believe that you can change everything you want to. Not always external things, but you can still change the way in which you choose to look at it and assign meaning. This allows you to get comfortable with change. It also promotes self-trust. You're learning to believe yourself and allow change to come because you've got your back! Because you know you're doing this in your best interest.


Once you've gotten yourself to a place where change feels a bit less daunting, you'll notice yourself gain more appreciation for the change that is happening around you, that change that is uncontrollable. Because now you can better understand how that change is working FOR you, helping in your own beautiful evolution. You'll then see the beauty in it.


Lastly, that part of you ( your ego-mind) that says "I don't want to let go of how things are", well it's scared...and I get it. Grief and pain are essential components of this change. Notice the emphasis on essential. I'm not here to tell you that these emotions are avoidable. Quit the contrary.


You will absolutely, without a doubt, encounter them on your way towards beautiful change. However, there IS a way to combat it or lessen the degree to which you experience it. This is with PRESENCE. Being in the NOW moment. Enjoying whatever experience you are participating in, loving it fully, giving it all your attention, feeling gratitude for it. This will help ease that grief and pain once the time comes to release it. Because you'll have a deep knowing that you didn't take it for granted (which is what elicits the grief response).


Let this be a reminder: Right now. In this moment. Wherever you are. Whomever you are. This moment is all that matters. Not what will happen tomorrow. Not where you wish you were. Not who you hope to be. Right now. You're experiencing the NOW moment in this form, for a reason. Let it show you what it needs to.


The NOW gives you all the information and knowledge you need in order to create that 'future moment' that you currently are wishing for. Believe in that and it WILL happen.


Your life requires your cooperation to change. Allow it, embrace it, accept and appreciate it. let it be what it needs to be. Let it transform you into the person you didn't know you were capable of being.


Ciara

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